Alright

So so far I have failed. I smoked a few cigarettes over the weekend, I don't know why, but I just wanted to. I'm very dissapointed in myself though, so I guess that's a good start.

I also CAN NOT stop myself from eating lately. Like I KNOW that I shouldn't eat tortilla chips by the handful, or 4 donut holes, or 3 brownies (they were small), or whatever else, but I just can't stop myself from doing. It's like I think to myself AS I'M EATING "I shouldn't be doing this" and then I go and grab another. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

It's Day 4 now

I'm feeling pretty good, but I am still in the mood to eat the whole world :(

I started my "personal touch" sessions with the instructor at Jazzercise and it was pretty good, although I'm not sore like I was told I would be, but it's only the first day after, sometimes it hurts more after the second day? I dunno, I'm gonna keep it up though and see how it goes.

Tomorrow evening is the annual awards ceremony for my company and I totally forgot about getting something dressy and formal to wear, so I'm gonna have to go shopping either tonight or tomorrow after work and hope I find something that I like, which is hard to do when you're last minute shopping. Grrr.

Day 2, no cigarettes

Diane, make a note of this:

It's day two without smoking and I feel like eating the world. I need some good old fashioned apple pie.

Anyway...
I haven't had any smokes today and I forgot to buy myself some gum, so I feel like munching munch munch munching and I don't have enough snacks to last me all day. In fact, of the food that I brought for myself today all I have left is my pasta salad for lunch and a small can of V8 juice and some applesauce. I think I am going to have to make a trip to WaWa or Sheetz and get myself some chewing gum and soda to tide myself over. I wonder how long it takes before the need for an oral fixation goes away and I will feel like normal again?

Happy January 7th!

Monday monday/ can't trust that day

So I started using the patch this morning, the nicotine patch that is. I haven't had any cigarette's yet today, which is a good start. I'm NOT going to have any cigarettes for the rest of my life! That's going to be my mantra everytime I get a craving for a smoke. No cigarettes EVER!

Saw Sweeny Todd last night, I liked it but Aaron didn't. Saw Olivia and Katherine there, that was cool. The movie was really dark and graphic, but I liked it.

Saturday I layed around and was lazy all freakin day, I felt kinda bad about that, but whatevs, I must have needed that.

It's a new year!

How about that? This year I promise to not get depressed and try to stay as positive about life and all that as possible. I'm back at work today and totally dragging, but that's ok because it looks like everyone is. Really all I want to do is go home and go back to bed, but that's not possible today so...

Aaron and I flew back from Chicago yesterday, it was cold and snowy there, and now it's pretty cold and snowy here, so it's like we never left. I was really dissapointed because they cancelled the fireworks at Buckingham Fountain on New Year's Eve, which really sucked because those are the best fireworks ever :(

I have nothing exciting to write about now, so I'm just gonna end this. Laterski!

Post Christmas Greetings and Happy New Year!

Hello everyone! I'm finally back at my desk to write a blog! How exciting. I had a good holiday this year. I got some pretty nice gifts from my lovely boyfriend, and his family and of course Jenn got me some great chocolate/coffee scented bath stuff and my cousin got me strawberry scented bath stuff and Aaron's folks got me pomegranite (sp?)/lychee scented bath stuff, so I should be set on bath stuff for a while, considering that I already had peach scented shower gel, rose scented shower gel, and spiced vanilla scented shower gel in my shower already. I can have a different scent everyday!

The only thing I didn't get was $120 so I could do "Personal Touch" at Jazzercise, which I guess I'm gonna have to pay for myself.

So I'm working on what my new year's resolutions are going to be, so far I have:

1. quit smoking (that was my resolution last year, and I did quit for almost six months, and then I started again, cuz I suck).

2. get back on program on Weight Watchers and lose another 30 lbs. (at least I actually completed on resolution this year, go me!)

3. watch less TV

4. read more books

5. keep my apartment clean and clutter free at all times (which I'm hoping I will be able to do if I watch less TV).

That's all I got so far and I think that's all I'm gonna do, cuz that's a tall order right there.

It's been a while since I posted

There's not much NEW going on in my life right to post about I guess. Life is just chug chug chuggin along as normal. I did a lot of shopping this weekend, but most of it was for me and not for Christmas presents, which I'm kinda feeling guilty about but whatever, I needed the stuff I bought so it wasn't all impulse buying. I did get a few presents for people though which is nice and now I will probably have to wait until my next paycheck which comes the Friday before Christmas before I can finish my Christmas shopping.

It's funny - I am a atheist/agnostic (born and raised if you will) and I celebrate Christmas because it's the "American Way" I suppose. This Chinese girl that I work with is also atheist/agnostic and she doesn't celebrate Christmas, because there aren't nearly as many Christains in China as there are in the US, so it's not as hyped up I guess. The thing is, Christmas (at least the way my family and a lot of families celebrate it) is not really that Christain of a holiday (not like Easter, Good Friday, etc.) The tree is Pagan, the colors red & green are pagan winter solstice colors, etc. etc. etc. So I suppose it doesn't really matter that I celebrate Christmas. I enjoy giving people presents as a way of showing them I appreciate them. I enjoy spending time with my friends and family. To me that's what Christmas is.

There's my rambling post for the week, I hope you enjoyed it.